Saturday, March 26, 2011
Well its been one year today since we moved to Texas. Wow and I am still here I didn't run home crying or hop on a plane when Mike was out of town. I have to admit I am really proud of myself not only did I last but I am learning to like it (a little bit)! A lot of people didn't think I was strong enough. I'm glad I can now say I am cause at first I really wasn't sure. I will say the first six months were horrible. I now know what being home sick is. It was rough, I was depressed and angry. I took a lot out on Mike and I am not very proud of that. Our marriage struggled a lot at first. Nothing puts more strain on a marriage than an unhappy wife. Luckily I have a great and very patient husband who loves me even when I am not very loveable. Wow am I blessed to have an amazing and very strong marriage. We weathered the storm together and it eventually brought us closer.
Going home made it worse I think because it was a constant reminder of what and who I was missing. Reminder of how easy it used to be to get a babysitter a free babysitter. If one couldn't do it I would just go down the list. Reminders of how easy girls nights and girl lunches and play groups and coffee nights used to be. Reminders of how much I missed my family and friends. How much I ached to and still do to see my niece and nephew every week. I hate having to watch them grow up through pictures and occasional visits. I hate even more that Hayden won't grow up the way I did with his family all around.
Ok well after reading that you are all thinking I am still depressed about living here and I'll be honest someday's I am. It's usually worse in the summer with the heat. The unbelievable melt your first layer of skin heat. Whoops okay back on track now....It's not as bad as it once was. I've made some really good friends and we have girls nights and play groups and coffee nights and even some serious shopping days. I do get to slowly get a new more colorful wardrobe because it's skin melting hot here most of the year unlike in Michigan where it was cold most of the year. Shopping is always fun. People are all very nice and our close friends treat us like family. We get invited to family holidays and birthday parties. Hayden is thriving here. I couldn't imagine a better school district for him. Mike loves work and works with a great group of people. We've found a great church that we actually attend every week and Hayden doesn't mind it too much...lol. That could be because we promise him McDonalds after if he does well. We've helped start a really great FX support group. I still talk to my sister every day on the phone and that will never change. Thank goodness for FB that way I can keep track of most of my friends and family. It helps me feel not so far away. I also love that people are willing to come here and visit too. It's so much nicer to have one on one time instead of feeling like you are pulled in every direction. Not to mention Hayden loves it soooo much better to have people over his house with his stuff in his comfort zone. Honestly I know Mike prefers it too....for a guy who travels so often...going home stresses him out so much!
Here are top 10 things I have learned since we moved to Texas.
1. Everything is bigger in Texas (except parking spots and road lanes)
2. Trees loose there leaves in the spring (what the heck is up with that????)
3. Accessorizing is a serious past time (hallelujah!!!)
4. Sweet tea is put in baby bottles (I kid you not I have seen it!)
5. The blue bonnets are gorgeous and grow wild, however, we have rattle snakes and fire ants too (why on earth would you walk your children through fields to get there pictures taken???)
6. Every truck brand has their own Texas addition (but Toyota is the only truck actually made in Texas oh, they have a Texas addition too)
7. The rodeo stinks...I mean it really smells (But man do they have great shopping at the rodeo! Who knew??)
8. They have SUPER Targets here!!! You can grocery shop, get glasses, gets your kids picture taken, get a cheesecake factory cheesecake and buy those super cute pair of shoes!!!! (where has this second home been all my life???)
9. People who don't know you wave to you and they hold conversations in the check out lines. (This I love Mike thinks its a little weird the chatting not waving part)
10. The pledge of Allegiance, the Texas flag pledge and a moment of silence (prayer) are held every morning in schools. (I still get a little teared up and I'm very proud to say I live in a state that believes this is still important)
Some of you are really disappointed that I did not mention in my top 10 the heat, or the bugs that are bigger than Baylee or anything about the food. I think the Texas food deserves a top 10 of its own....so coming soon the top ten things I've learned about Texas food addition.
I want to personally say thank you to everyone who let me cry on the phone when it was really bad in the beginning. I want to thank everyone who has come to visit. We love having you here. Any one who hasn't been but wants to please do. We'd love to have you. Thank you to all of our family and friends who understand that this move was out of necessity and not choice. Well we all know Mike wanted to come...lol. I want to thank all of my friends here in Texas who understand it has nothing to do with Texas or not liking it here when I still call Michigan home. Thank you so much to all of our friends here who have taken us in and invited us to spend holidays with you and your families it is an honor. Thank you to all of my friends here for your love and support and most of all your friendship. You have made it so much easier to be away from my family. I especially want to thank anyone who has prayed for us and our transition here. It has meant the world to us. We miss you all terribly but we're gonna be just fine here deep in the heart of Texas.
Friday, March 18, 2011
Let me tell you all a little bit about the day I became all I wanted to be! It was March 18, 2005. That was the day my whole world was born. Hayden Michael Makris came into the world at 5:28pm weighing 7 lbs 9 oz and 20" long.
Let me back up just a little bit....For those of you that don't know Mike and I tried for 3 long years to get pregnant. Finally with the help of a fertility specialist and IVF we were pregnant. To say that we were excited would be an understatement! So when the day finally came for me to give birth to this little boy we just could not wait!! But in true Hayden fashion he made us WAIT. We were scheduled to have a C-section at 9am. We got a call at 7am telling us not to come till 11 and the surgery would be at 12:30 (please keep in mind that I had nothing to eat since midnight the night before). Then they called and told us not to come till 12. So we get to the hospital at 12 and he still keeps us waiting ....lets take a little side journey for a moment since we have the time...Mike's Aunt Cindy was the first to arrive. Now those of you that know Mike's Aunt Cindy know that this in itself is a miracle! Sorry Aunt Cindy hopefully that does not offend you in any way... ;) You know how much we love you! My mom, dad and sister show up at the wrong hospital. Ok back on track 1pm, 2pm, 3pm (still waiting and still starving) 4pm, they finally take me back at 5pm. I would find out later that one of the other doctors in the office had to have emergency surgery by the doctor that was delivering Hayden. So mean while I'm finally in the delivery room and then the most unbelievable thing happens...I hear a baby cry...not just any baby...my baby!! For the first time in my life I am a mommy. This little bundle of joy that we prayed so hard for and hoped so long for is finally here. My whole life all I ever wanted to be was a mom....I don't remember ever wanting to be anything else. I am a MOM (said with complete and utter awe). I am a MOM!!! People tell you all the time it's a feeling like you have never known...that too is an understatement..I don't even know how to describe that feeling..pure love, joy and every other good word you can think of. Here's one of the greatest things about delivering by C-section in a small hostpital...I was the first to hold him..yep I carried (ok well wheeled) him out of the delivery room in my arms. As far as C-sections go this is unheard of. Yep I was the first one to hold this bundle of joy. How awesome it was that the minute they put him into my arms he stopped crying. Oh how hard it was to give him up and let someone else hold him. There would however been a small riot had I not shared a little bit.
Wow 6 years!! Six seems so big - so old - so not a baby - so not my little man...well ok he'll always be my little man.
Hayden has touched so many people. You just can't help but fall in love with him. You just can't help but want to squeeze him and kiss him. You just can't help but want to give him a high five. This little boy just gets to everyone. Maybe its his beautiful eyes or his infectious grin or maybe its his little voice or his goofy little tendencies. He knows people, he understands people, and to be such a little boy he is an amazing judge of character. I get the distinct privilege and honor of being his mommy!!
So I say to this amazing little boy thank you, thank you for making me all I ever wanted to be!!
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Wow is all I can say about the week I'm having and how long it's taken to update this blog. Sorry about that. Some of the blogs I read are so good about it and I always think man I gotta update ours. That said today I write this blog on an amazing day (not that I don't think all days are amazing). But today is Fragile X advocacy day. What is advocacy day well to put it simply (I stole it from FB (thank you Shannon). Today, Fragile X advocates all around the country are meeting with Congress to help secure funding, advance research, and spread the word about Fragile X Syndrome. Mike is one of those advocates. I don't have to tell you how blessed I am to have such a great daddy for our precious little boy. I don't need to tell you how proud I am that I get to be his wife. God has touch our lives in so many ways. He has given us life, hope, support and has put amazing people in our lives to nurture and guide us. A good friend who has just recently come into my life reminded me of this bible verse Jeremiah 29:11 "I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." This road that we are on is a long and sometimes painful but I will never again question that God is with me. I may not understand all the why's. I will someday. I promise to Look at each and every blessing I have in my life daily to be reminded of this. I am grateful for this amazing man that God put into my life. I really can say I married my best friend. I am grateful for the little boy that calls me mommy. He never ceases to amaze and humble me. Just this morning the sweetest thing happened. At 3:10 am I hear his little voice saying "mommy" "mommy" thinking it is in the monitor....my first thought was oh no we are not getting up at 3:10 in the morning. I turn to get out of bed and there he is looking at me with that sweet little face and sleep eyes. I say "what do you need buddy, you need to go back to sleep" he then climbs into my bed, get's comfy, steals one of my pillows, pulls my face to his chest and goes back to sleep. This is that small reminder that my life is so good!! Now to many of you that may be nothing. Your kids may sneak into your bed every other night. Hayden never has. He loves his own space and doesn't want to share it. So this was very rare and way special.
Today is also what is know as spread the word to end the word. I hate this word, I hate when it is used in a clinical setting and I hate it even more when it is used as slang. It's the one and probably only word that makes my stomach sour. Imagine with me if you will the little boy at the top of this page being called retarded. You don't like it do you? Now lets take it one step further and imagine being that little boy's mommy or daddy and having to hear it over and over again in an IEP. Because that is the label they gave him. Not Fragile X but mentally retarded. Imagine how sick it would make you if he was your child. Imagine what it does to Mike, myself and the many other parents who have children with special needs. Imagine what it does to us when we hear this word used in slang. I ask you as family and friends of the little boy at the top of this page to stop using that word. Today is a great day to pledge to show respect to people with intellectual disabilities, their families & friends. Take the R-word out of your vocabulary and then spread the word to end the word!